How to Dim Sum
Offer elders to sit away from the aisle and closer to the wall. Maybe this is a subtle tactic to steer them away from being able to pay (see below).
Do not use your own chopsticks to grab things from communal dishes. Instead, use the communal chopsticks.
If you must use your own chopsticks to grab something from a communal plate for some reason (maybe there are no communal chopsticks or they haven’t come to the table yet), you can use the back side of your chopsticks since that side has not been in your filthy mouth yet.
If your teapot runs out of tea, you can take the lid and place it off to the side of the pot to signal to staff that you need a refill. If it’s a metal teapot, just keep the lid open.
If you’re at a place where they have staff pushing carts around, the cart person can be aggressive in getting you to accept something from their cart. If you’re unsure, they may say something like “It’s really good, you should try it!” Just a polite “no thank you” and/or a shake of the head is a good response.
Dim sum is not an all-you-can-eat buffet.
If you see others at the table, especially elders, who have empty tea cups, get the teapot and pour tea in their cup; and then, always lastly pour for yourself.
When someone pours tea for you, tap your index finger near your teacup to give thanks.
Eat the chicken feet.
If something’s too hard to grab with your chopsticks (it’s slippery or irregular shaped), sometimes it’s just easier to stab things with your chopsticks instead.
If there’s a lazy susan, don’t turn it if someone else is already turning it.
Fight to pay the check. Lose. Be upset that you lost.
The pro move is: going to the bathroom, paying the check on the way back, and making others upset that you paid without them knowing.
Take all the leftovers home: there’s no shame in it, and they make great leftovers. Wetter foods (like chicken feet, you got those, right?) should be in separate containers from dry foods (like buns).